Wednesday, 27 August 2014


Monday, 25 August 2014

Human Interactions: Being a social magnet: Part 4

Something that I suck at is keeping people interested in what I am saying or getting people to want to talk to me for long periods.

When I attend socials, I can be termed as the opposite to a social magnet.

To be a social magnet, don't be like me!

Here are some things I do: 
  1. I make little eye contact when I speak. Its like I scan for mystery objects and follow them around searching for the thoughts in my mind.

  2. I am very aware of the speaker but, do not show this to the speaker in my facial expressions or body language. I have very little facial expressions.

  3. I am not good at relating events, if I see no point in it.

  4. I find it hard to follow and understand events being retold and tend to drift away, trying to understand it or simply hooking onto some key words and making some connections with those, and hence missing the whole event that was related.

  5. Small talk is alien concept, in that I have no ideas how to make it and see no point in why people do it.

  6. I drift into analysing every little thing and enjoy the process immensely, the solution to things seldom interests me, and hence most seem to find this tiring since, to others it looks as if I am going in circles, but it is just me looking at various options.

  7. I enjoy analyzing weaknesses and issues. Most people prefer not to delve into these, since they see it as negative. They prefer to avoid this and love to relate pleasant events.

  8. It does not interest me to be liked and people seldom interest me, unless they have some ideas or topics of interest to me.

  9. When I meet a women who I find sexually attractive, then my survival instinct comes to play and I go into caveman mode, it becomes all about getting her body and her mind is irrelevant, which in most cases is a turn off
Here is Human Interactions Part 1

    Tuesday, 19 August 2014


    In some cases success is defined as having a highly paying career, having made millions, winning the lottery, being world champion, saving millions of lives etc.

    In the end, to find food and shelter is the main goal. We all wish to survive and store resources for a rainy day, and to do it easily and without stress.

    In general we are not all self-sustaining, that is, we do not produce ourselves, all that we need to secure our food and shelter.

    Hence it boils down to selling your services in a job or trading the products you have produced to support your daily food and shelter needs.

    If you are lucky and you have interests, skills and products wanted by many, then your daily trading will be lucrative.

    In these cases, those lucky individuals, probably see their activities as their hobbies and hence are highly motivated.

    For most it’s more a case of doing something else to make enough, since their own interests and skills are not what most prefer to trade for.

    Take the sports world. Track and field athletes, only the top few can make a decent living from it. However, soccer matches fill stadiums only for local matches.

    Whereas, the European athletics championship, can’t even fill the stadium. Hence, there is not much money for the athletics enthusiasts, but millions for the soccer players.

    So if you were lucky enough to enjoy soccer and became good at it at a regional level, you would most likely make much more than a national sprint athlete.

    Since soccer is so well known in bringing fortunes, many then dream of being soccer players,  because of what it offers.

    In my opinion, if you then make it big, you are not successful, if you do not have a natural liking for soccer and just did it because it is something you enjoy due to the fortune that came from it.

    I would say, the one who does what he enjoys with passion, even if it is not well compensated and still manages to provide food and shelter, has achieved success.

    Be who you are and do what you like. 

    Don’t scan the markets to see where you can sell your soul for a dollar.

    Success is when you have survived by being yourself.


    Wednesday, 13 August 2014

    Organised Societies Part 2: Conducting the Masses !!!

    I prefer not to follow the news, because it is filled with negativity, however at times, it can be used to get people to join a cause.

    We all belong to groups, whether it is sports, work, friends, religion, family, ideas, practices or culture. 

    We feel safety in numbers.

    It is probable, that you will stand up or even fight for the causes of the group you belong to. 

    We do this to gain Hope Energy and correlate this to maintaining our own safety. 

    Some may also become lost in the group identity and just follow any cause of the group.

    If this happens it could be that causes are blindly followed irrespective whether its good or bad.

    It then only matters that it is a cause of the group.

    Once you have aligned to a group, it takes a special effort to see the causes with your own identity, since you have become the group.

    If it becomes possible to oppose a cause of your group, then this special event could be met with great opposition. 

    A task that requires heaps of latent Hope Energy to oppose and which most of us probably do not have to spare. 

    We don’t like to rock our own groups.

    If a cause is not sensational or extreme, where you can clearly categorize, most people won’t react. 

    Most people when they see a man asking for help because he is hurt, will not help. If the same man is knocked by a car then, more likely, people will help.

    Many times people need extremes to see its black, else it just looks grey and they can’t determine if it’s a bad or good thing or what to do. 

    Unless of course, somebody initiates an action, then people more likely will follow. 

    That is, the man probably does not need help if he asks, but he probably needs help if some other person says he does, especially if it’s an important person or it’s in the media hype.

    In the same way, if some people are being bombed, it is extreme and people can then see it is a black and not a grey situation. 

    At any given moment there are many injustices all over the world. However, folk most likely only react to those which can be seen as extreme. 

    This is where the news, media hype and propaganda is so effective in conducting the masses.

    It was never about who is ruling. It will always be about surviving. We as living things tend to hang on to what we think we need to survive. In many cases we think this relates to being in the ruling power group. 

    This need to survive in most cases overshadows sympathy for others and hence, we tend to share less in what we perceive as grey events or much more when an extreme event is clearly highlighted in the news. 

    We are a nation of news believers.

    You can also read the article Organised Societies, which gives an idea of how people tend to herd and strive for leading or ruling positions to assist in their own survival and forgetting that these coveted roles are merely just roles and not really what is needed to survive.

    Sunday, 10 August 2014

    Video: MMA/BJJ Training Girls: Monkey plays with P. Bear

    A short while back I wrote on how get my girls to remain in shape.

    On many occasions it becomes quite a challenge, in that girls normally are not in the mood for physical activity.

    I had some ideas on how to get Monkey to enjoy some lessons. One was to get her to teach me what she knows.

    This soon turned out into a shouting emotional match, since she had no interests in doing that.

    Monkey is afraid of failure and has high standards for herself. So much so that she prefers not to try anything than to fail at times.

    Even the more she achieves the more she doubts herself, in some ways.

    She always feels she does not know and cannot do.

    Today we tried something else. Lets just play and see what she can do.

    I think it turned out much better than expected and she seemed to have had fun.

    The secret was to ask what it is she prefers to do.

    Yes, of course MMA/BJJ is my idea, however within this framework, its good to give her some freedom in how she wants to do it.

    Monkey is the youngest of my three daughters, unfortunately for the Queeny she had to learn the hard way.

    Then again each kid is not the same, so teaching becomes a challenge even in round three

    In the mean time I hope all who sees this video can take some lessons in connecting with your child, learning to move, defense, timing, body balance, brain calculations etc., the lists goes on and one...

    And of course it will keep her in shape.

    I HOPE.

    Thursday, 7 August 2014

    Be ME

    The world has many types of people and we can never tell who likes what.

    Hence, my policy is just to be ME.

    Maybe somebody likes what I do. Or maybe not.

    At least I find out what I can do and not waste energy thinking what others might want me to be.

    However feedback from others and my own experiences makes me who I am .

    All feedback is registered and applied in some way.

    Keep on interacting and being you.

    Wednesday, 6 August 2014

    Pop's Kitchen: Salmon Tandoori with yogurt spring onion cucumber salad

    After  recording the Peach dessert, Pops said she needed time to make a video again.

    So we decided to make a photo video.

    This summer, as part of my project at home with the kids, we decided to document the kids hobbies.

    Pops started enjoying cooking and baking a year ago and agreed to present it in a video.

    A skill that will surely come in handy when she is an adult.

    As I have realized, talking to a camera is not as easy as it looks and hence she was not prepared to do it again, a day later.

    Especially, since she normally makes a meal only once. She has a goal to cook all the menu's she likes in the cookbook she bought.

    Maybe when she repeats a meal again, we will get her to make another video and hopefully in the near future her true relaxed joking self will also show.

    Small steps, however we certainly enjoy Pops's Kitchen.

    Queeny and Monkey will soon document their hobbies.

    Monday, 4 August 2014

    Pops's Kitchen: Baking Cream Peach Berries Dessert

    Pops has been cooking and baking for a year now.

    She bought a cook book and her mission is to make everything in it at least once.

    This video is about her making a dessert for her mother's birthday.

    It is the 1st time she makes this dessert and also our first attempt at filming her making something.

    Pops's first language is not English, so she was nervous talking.

    Hope you enjoy the video.

    Saturday, 2 August 2014

    My husband is beautiful

    I discovered the power of self hypnosis.

    Self reflection made easier with the advent of video.

    This morning I woke with a bang of happiness and wanted to share it with myself and I.

    Friday, 1 August 2014

    Video: Talking to Myself. Part1

    I decided to start recording my thoughts, to help me find myself and give me direction.

    This is not easy.

    Everything has to start somewhere. Here are my first seven clips, unedited mostly for my own viewing pleasure.

    Of course any feedback I receive will be much appreciated, since its what I like, that is to bounce my thoughts off others and get external clarity.

    So thanks to those who will give feedback and my message to the rest, just be who you are.

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